When It's All Said and Done, is the Price Too High?
by ICX
We just hired a new staff member, and I have to admit I'm feeling kind of maternal. He's coming to Nashville from Boise and has never really lived too far from home. He's going to leave his family, friends and everything that's familiar to him. I know that feeling all too well.
Like him, I had a comfortable life in a comfortable town, making a comfortable living. But I knew that I wanted more than an easy life. I wanted to know if I could make it on the air with the best of the best, so off I went to try. That was six states ago.
I have learned a lot of different things in my quest to play with the big boys. I've learned what it's like to spend a three-day weekend hanging by yourself because your husband is across the country. I've learned what it's like to try to think of Christmas as just another day. I've learned how to make my mom's special Thanksgiving stuffing, even though I never seem to get it quite right.
I understand what it's like for someone to be selfish. It's hard to admit that, but it's true. I always thought of myself as a pretty generous person, but putting your career over the special days of your friends and family, it's absolutely a selfish undertaking. And I've learned how to pack an entire house up in less than three days.
There are days when I look back on the choices that I made to further this little radio career, and I'm sad. The other day I was at the doctor's office, just kind of talking with my physician, when she offhandedly mentioned to me that if my husband and I wanted to have kids, she figured we had about three to six months to get rocking. After all, I am going to be 38 in December. It struck me like a ton of bricks. Not that we really have considered having kids, but it just kind of hit me that somewhere between doing mornings in Yakima, Wash., and here in Nashville, I aged to the point of no longer being able to bear children. Just one more thing I gave up along the way.
I look at our new staff member and I'm excited for him. He's a single guy, I would put him in his upper 20s, and I think he has a great future. I think he's going to be a real asset and I'm excited about the prospects. But I know it's going to be hard. I know that there are going to be moments he second-guesses his choice. I hope and pray he won't have to make some of the same concessions I had to. I am thankful that his big move involves a company as compassionate as ours is. He won't have to debate whether or not he can go home should a parent get ill, like I did. So I think he's definitely ahead of the game.
Everyone asks me if I regret leaving Yakima. Not for a second. I regret some of the choices I made afterward, but none as far as leaving. Sure, I miss our house, tucked away off the road with the amazing view of the valley. I miss my parents being only 10 minutes away. I miss our friends. But I'd rather live a life without wondering what if. And I'm hoping that for our friend from Boise.
When my entire family is getting together, I really miss home. But the opportunity that I have been given is a selfish, yet satisfying tradeoff. I get to live my dream. And even though I sometimes stumble, I know that when I dust myself off, home is only a plane ride away and dreams do come true.
